Obama wants more people to go to college (using your money of course)

With an ever-increasing display of compassion and generosity, Obama has declared that he wants to make it easier for the unemployed to gain access to Pell Grants to help people pay for school. Currently, the unemployed are not allowed access to Pell grants; this is for two reasons: 1.) you are supposed to already in college when you apply (i.e. not 'unemployed'), and 2.) when accepting unemployment benefits from the state, the state actually expects (get this) that you are actively engaged in finding a job for yourself. 

However, not just anyone is eligible for Pell grants; that is because these grants are not merit-based, they are income-based. And no, they are not held exclusively for those who pay taxes (like you were probably about to guess, right?), but are instead for the 'needy'. In fact, even if you, yourself, are 'needy' but your parents are not, you probably won't qualify.

This proposal is a trifecta for Obama, since he can distribute more wealth from the wealth creators to the wealth consumers, simultaneously remove a whole lot of unemployed people from the 'unemployed category', thus prettying-up his dismal economic stats, and make important inroads to his goal of establishing "free" college for everyone. 

I see a whole lot of Bachelors of Community Organizing degrees being awarded in the near future.